4 May 2015

See You On The Other Side!

Right now I just feel as though I'm failing at everything. My whole body feels like it working so hard, yet there is that constant nagging thought in the back of my mind that's telling me all of the hours spending revising were for nothing. That I'm going to fail all my exams and not get enough points in order to go to 6th form.

This is just too much bloody pressure for a 15 year old girl to deal with and I cannot wait for the torture to end.

I say role on the warm summer days, the uniform-hanging-up-in-the-cupboard days and the days when I can have a lay in and not feel guilty that I should be doing something else. I want to be able to sit down a watch a good film, have a shower without rushing to get back to my desk, spend time with my family without clock watching constantly and most of all getting back to blogging. I hate how I have been torn away from here- neglected you all. I mean when was the last time I took part in a Twitter chat? But there is no way on earth I can keep it up while I'm running around like a headless chicken. And I miss it but I promise I will be back soon!

The only thing that is getting me through each day, putting a stop to my flow of frustrated and angry and emotionally drained tears, is the thought that on the 18th June I will be finished for three long, glorious months! That means no exams. No school. Nothing. Just me, the TV and as much chocolate as I can eat. Gods knows that is all I want right now! It's not much to ask really is it?

I know this sounds so dramatic and whingey and it's just unfortunate that you have to sit and read it.

I'll end this little rant by thanking you for all your support these past fews months and for sticking by In The Clouds even though it's been pretty quite around here lately and the content I do manage to write up has been rather...unimaginative and dull!

I cannot quite believe that tomorrow I will be sitting my very first GCSE exam. I remember starting senior school and thinking (as well as crying pretty much every morning for the first couple of months) how far away those exams were- 5 years! It seemed like an absolute age then but now it's all gone so incredibly quickly. Soon I will be going into secondary education and everyone will be leaving me for college and other 6th forms, and I can't help but think of how many wonderful memories and friends I have made at this god forsaken place. Just a load of bricks, yet it seems so much more.

Part of me wants the exams over and done with, but the other half knows that after the 18th June nothing will ever be the same again. For that I am sad and as much as I bang on about hating school and being a teenager, I will dearly miss that part of my life. Strange eh?

See you on the other side!
Love Beth xx

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